What Plants Teach Us About Healing and Growth

In her beautiful and thought-provoking book Lessons from Plants, biologist and botanist Beronda Montgomery invites us to look at the natural world as not only something to observe, but something to learn from—especially when it comes to how we relate to ourselves and each other.

I found Lessons from Plants to be a compelling metaphor for human well-being. Montgomery writes, “Plants are not simply passive beings, but dynamic participants in their environments.” This simple truth struck me deeply: like plants, we are all doing our best to survive and adapt under ever-changing conditions, many of which are out of our control.

One of the most powerful takeaways for me was the way Montgomery highlights the communal nature of plant life. She explains how plants communicate, support one another, and thrive in diverse ecosystems. The “Three Sisters” method—an Indigenous planting strategy that grows corn, beans, and squash together for mutual benefit—demonstrates how collaboration and diversity create resilience. In couples therapy or polyamorous dynamics, I often emphasize that our differences are not weaknesses but potential strengths. Montgomery shows that nature agrees.

Perhaps the part of the book that I found the most impactful, though, is this: when a houseplant is struggling, we don’t shame it. We don’t say it’s weak or not trying hard enough. Instead, we ask: does it need more light? Less water? A bigger pot? “When plants don’t thrive,” Montgomery writes, “we change the environment, not the plant.”

Yet, when people are struggling—whether with depression, anxiety, work burnout, or relational difficulties—we so often blame them instead of considering what supports are missing. This insight has profound implications for mental health. Rather than internalizing failure, we must ask: What systems, environments, or relationships need to shift to support our flourishing?

As you navigate your own life, remember that your struggles are not signs of weakness. They may be signs that your current environment isn’t meeting your needs.

Lessons from Plants reminds us that healing, growth, and survival are not solitary pursuits. Like the plants around us, we are meant to grow in community—and we deserve environments that nurture us.